I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been in a room with the C-suite and heard comments about nursing or other departments. “Why are they always whining?,” they’d ask. This in response to requests for more staffing or equipment.
And I’ll admit, it used to anger me when I’d hear their comments. What do you mean, “they’re whining”? These are legitimate concerns about being understaffed, lacking resources, facing impossible situations.
But here’s the hard truth I’ve learned over the years: the issue wasn’t that the concerns weren’t valid. The issue was how those concerns were being presented. that they didn’t have the wherewithal to create a case and present that case, or have somebody advocate for them in presenting that case.
There’s a world of difference between venting frustration and building a compelling argument. And in healthcare, where emotions run high and stakes are even higher, learning to speak up effectively—without losing respect or your temper—isn’t just a nice-to-have skill. It’s essential.
Moving From Emotion to Understanding
Let’s be honest about something we don’t discuss enough: the emotional aspect of feeling discounted or feeling angry when your concerns aren’t heard. When you’re on the front lines, seeing what needs to change, experiencing the daily struggles firsthand, and then having your input dismissed as “whining”—that’s infuriating. It’s demoralizing. And it makes you want to either shut down completely or come in guns blazing.
Neither approach works.
What does work is learning to harness that emotion and channel it into persuasive, professional communication that gets results. We need to talk more about this—about how to take that feeling of being discounted and transform it into a powerful case for change.
From Gum on a Shoe to Getting Results
I remember specifically an experience a CFO shared with me about a tenacious employee who just wouldn’t give up. She just kept coming back, coming back, and coming back about something her department needed. The CFO told me, “She’s like gum on my shoe. She just won’t let go.”
And you know what? That’s exactly what we need to be when we have a legitimate request or concern. Persistent. Tenacious. Like gum on a shoe.
But in the right way. And with the right approach.
In this case, I sat down with the employee and asked: “What is it that you really want?” She told me. And then we talked about how she might reframe her approach in a way that would be more impactful and compelling to the CFO: “This is what we need. This is why we need it. This is what it’s going to bring to the hospital.”
It worked. He was so convinced by her argument, he would have sworn it was his idea.
That’s the power of effective communication.
The Framework That Works
So what does effective advocacy look like? Based on decades of experience working with healthcare professionals, here’s the framework:
- Start with clarity. Know exactly what you want before you open your mouth. Vague complaints get vague responses. Specific requests get specific consideration.
- Build your case. Don’t just state the problem. Articulate why it matters to the organization and what solving it will accomplish. Connect your request to organizational goals—whether that’s patient satisfaction, safety metrics, staff retention, or the bottom line.
- Present with confidence. This is where Amy Cuddy’s work on presence comes in. Your boldest self needs to show up for your biggest challenges. Body language, tone, and delivery matter just as much as your words.
- Be persistent. Remember the gum on the shoe. Don’t take “no” as a final answer when the issue is important. But each time you come back, come back with a stronger case, more data, better framing.
Frame your requests and recommendations as collaboration: Instead of “You need to fix this,” try “Here’s what we could accomplish together if we addressed this.” Make it their idea, their win. Who cares who gets credit if the problem gets solved?
Stop whining. Start building cases. Be like gum on a shoe—persistent, present, and impossible to ignore.
Tags: communication skills, healthcare leadership, healthcare management, nurse leadership, professional advocacy
