“Wait a minute, maybe it’s me…”
I’m an idea person. I’m creative, and I like to think of new possibilities—“We can do this!,” “We can do that!” But not everybody gets as excited by my ideas as I do.
I remember sitting in a staff meeting where I was excitedly talking about an idea I had for the mystery shopping division. As I spoke, I looked out and saw all the project managers staring at me, arms crossed and shooting daggers.
I stopped myself and thought, “What’s happening here? Do they hate me? Do they hate the idea? What’s wrong with them? They’re all being so negative.”
One of them finally spoke up: “Wait a second. Is this a plan or an idea, and what do you expect of us?”
Another project manager was even more direct: “No, we’re not doing this. Period.”
The Moment of Truth
My initial reaction: frustration. I thought, “What is wrong with these people? Can’t they see that this is a great opportunity? Can’t they see the possibilities? Don’t they see the vision?”
And then I had a crucial realization: Wait a minute. Maybe it’s me.
I talked with a trusted coach who reminded me that not everyone processes information like me and that personality testing would help us understand each other better. The results provided us with fantastic insights about how we each approach problem-solving, and how we each functioned under stress.
We did what I called speed dating where we met in pairs and compared our profiles side by side. I learned something incredibly important about myself. I learned that I was expecting others to process information exactly like me – an entrepreneurial ideas person. The project managers were nothing like me. But they were exactly the best people for their jobs as project managers. They were methodical, scientific-minded and analytical. before they were ready. While I was at 30,000 feet thinking about what if, they were grounded thinking about how.
The test comparisons showed us how we needed to consider the other person’s MO and what specific communication skills we needed to use when communicating with each other. I was coming on way to strong and needed to give them time to process an idea before charging forward or even getting into a deep discussion.
Understanding the Pace of Change
As a leader, I’ve had to learn to take the time to understand each individual on my team. I need to know how they handle change. I need to also consider how I expect them to handle change. And I need to understand the difference between the two.
Understanding takes time.
Most of the changes we’re implementing today aren’t like the kinds of changes we were forced to implement during the peak of COVID. Back then, innovation and change were happening multiple times daily. We were continually learning new things about the disease, how it was spread, and how healthcare organizations and staff had to adapt in real time.
Today, by contrast, most of the things we’re handling aren’t that urgent and time-sensitive. We don’t need to plow forward without fully understanding our audience.
The Power of Planting Seeds
With my project management team, I learned that I had to plant a seed about an idea and give them at least a few days to mull it around before we met to talk about it. The difference was day and night.
Change management is a vital leadership skill, but you’ve got to know your audience. Some people need time to process. Some need to understand the why before they can embrace the what. Others need to see how and the practical steps before they can buy into the vision.
Reading Your Room
The next time you’re introducing change to your team, pause and really look at the faces around you. What are their expressions telling you? Are they engaged and excited, or do you see confusion, resistance, or overwhelm? Ask for input and quietly wait for a response.
Your ability to read the room—and adjust your approach accordingly—can make the difference between a change that transforms your organization and one that creates unnecessary friction and stress.
Remember: great ideas deserve enthusiasm and great execution. And great execution starts with understanding the people who will make it happen.
Read the room!
Tags: audience feedback, employee feedback, influence, influencing others, listening, listening posts, listening skills, self-awareness
