Knowing when you need to get out of the way to help your team grow
Those of us in the healthcare industry tend to be caring people—that’s what drew us into the profession. But, sometimes, our tendency to care gets intertwined with being a fixer which can keep us from being effective leaders. When caring turns into carrying, we’re doing our team members a disservice. We’re not giving them the freedom, space, and opportunity to grow.
By carrying, I am talking about the tendency to get involved in every situation in the unit and providing the solution to every problem. This feeds the illusion the only you, the leader, can keep things running effectively. You essentially carry the entire load. Why? Coaching new leaders has taught me that many of them are under the illusion that, as the leader, they should have all the answers. Imagine the burden that they carry with this mindset.
I recently attended a conference where the keynote speaker talked about this critical distinction. And, really, there is a huge difference. It’s a distinction that new leaders often don’t recognize.
New leaders tend to jump in to problem-solve and fix things, rather than coaching their team members to be better at problem-solving for themselves.
It’s a tendency that I see all the time and it does a disservice to leaders, their team members, and the organization. Leaders often suffer because in the process of attempting to be “fixers” they can burn themselves out. Team members also suffer because they don’t grow by learning to confidently problem-solve on their own. Simultaneously, the organization doesn’t gain the value of strong team members or leaders.
So what can we do to avoid the tendency to carry? Here are five important steps you can take.
Five Ways to Care Without Carrying
- Be an active listener. This means listening without interruption and listening with your eyes as well as your ears. Remember that silence, even though it may sometimes feel awkward, is a vital element of active listening. Resist the urge to fill every silent moment with your solutions. Also, work to become skilled at recognizing both verbal and nonverbal signals. It’s not only what’s said that can convey meaning, but what is not said but signaled through nonverbal cues. But, as you listen, don’t just interpret and assume you’ve interpreted correctly. Validate what you believe you’ve heard or seen. “It sounds like you’re really upset about that. Is that true?”
- Ask open-ended questions. Open-ended questions invite more input than a simple “yes” or “no” and can help you gain more in-depth insights into what your team members are feeling or thinking. Ask probing questions like: “What do you think would work here?” “What do you think would be a great first step?” These are questions designed to inspire the other person to problem-solve, to do some critical thinking, and to gain independence.
- Offer your support, but not solutions. This is where caring comes into play. Ask: “How can I support you?” Here, you’re not proposing a solution. You’re encouraging your team member to think of what a good solution would be and you’re offering to be supportive. There’s a big difference.
- Resist the urge to take over. This can be especially hard if you’ve been in the same role and faced the same issues. Yes, you may know the answer. But providing it doesn’t help your team members grow. Don’t carry—care.
- Finally—and this is really important—remind your team members of their strengths, their capabilities and their past successes. “You know. This is tough. But I’ve seen you go through similar difficult situations and I’m really confident that you can handle this.
The Leadership Payoff
The difference between caring and carrying may seem subtle. Mastering the distinction, though, is what really separates truly effective leaders from those who eventually burn out from carrying too much weight that isn’t theirs to bear.
These are the skills that we teach participants in our leadership development workshops. Learn more about how Baird Group can help your leaders fully leverage their caring nature without slipping into carrying others’ burdens on their shoulders.
Tags: coaching in healthcare, effective coaching, employee coaching, employee development, leadership best practices, leadership coaching, micro-management, professional development
